Un-Gay Yourself?

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I have been blog hopping and a few of the blogs I follow posted this question:


If there was a pill that one could take to turn them straight, would you take it?


I really took a long, deep and hard look at the question before I was able to answer.


My instant and off the top of my head, and perhaps, gut answer was YES. I would! Yes because life would be easier if I was a straight male! YES because masculinity, in this world, this lifetime and this current reality, is STILL power!


I have always advised young badettes I have come in contact with, who would tell me how they see their badingness as a 'crisis' or as a 'phase', how I wished them well, and hoped to the high heavens that they would resolve their confusion in favor of heterosexuality, rather than homosexuality. I always think that if you can not be strong enough, then you should not have any business being gay at all. Stay straight! For the life of you!

I know I will be getting a beating from the Homoactivists about this, but really, with all due respects, let me say that it has not been very easy for any of us PLU's no matter how 'blessed' we may have been. When friends would say of their sons or young boys "Hala, bata pa, nagbabadya na!" (So young yet showing signs of Homosexuality) I would always say "sana naman wag, (I fervently hope, he will not be).



I consider myself as someone who, well, relatively, had it easy on the 'growing up gay', thing. Maybe because I was bisexual and had meaningful relationships with girls, it was easier for me than most people to grow up gay and embrace fully my sexuality. I did not have the 'lublob dram' scene, nor got beaten shit less to 'masculinate' me nor got sent forcibly to some 'masculinating' activity such as the military, church or the local prosti den. Besides, I am not the effeminate sissy or cross dressing and I had natural interests in some 'non-gay' activities, such as roughing it out, mountain climbing/hiking, and other such stereotypical macho stuff. The only dead give away is my zero interest in playing basketball, which is a pinoy male thing. My non-alcoholic lifestyle is easily written off due to my allergy. My father would swear off that I am not gay, and would be very confused since I would bring home my girlfriends. Even if at one time, he said that he would never accept me being gay, and I answered him, I do not need you to accept my being gay or anything, I am just informing you that I am, end of conversation.



My story is really simple. I do not even attribute my being gay to a traumatic past. I was not a molested child. Though I was a battered kid under an uber disciplinarian Dad, his emotional absence was never a reason for me to have been gay. It was never a crisis for me and I have never undergone the whole disbelief/rejection/fighting it/bargain stages of grief thinggie. I just had an epiphany and my 'outing mantra' has always been this: "If two people understand each other, enjoy each other, would like to be together and love each other, why should it stop them from being together just because they are of the same sex?"

I have never also wanted to be a girl. I am not one to say "I am a woman trapped in a man's body." I'd rather say I am a man open enough to understand that sometimes you just want Dick. As I have said, I never wanted to be a girl. I like my Dick, and the things I can do with it. I do not have a revulsion towards the vagina. In fact, I like them. I get turned on by a curvaceous sexy little thing! Big boobs give me a pecker. I equally get aroused by girly strip tease and macho dancing grooves. I even warn some of my close female friends not to get too chummy with me because if they hug me and I get a boner, its not my fault... blame hormones.



Now, on to the question. Do I wanna ungay myself and take the pill? As I have said, it is never easy to be gay; most especially be a bisexual gay. If you have a jealous partner, you are in for a rut! You can not look at other men, nor can you look at other women! Double Jeopardy, I should say. DO not get me wrong. For me, bisexuality has never been and should never be an excuse for infidelity. If I have a boyfriend, I do not take on other girls. Same as when I have a girlfriend, it does not give me a license to have a boyfriend on the sides.

Reading the blog HERE, the author posits that the reason he does not want to take the pill is because he does not want to trade and lose his current relationship with his lover at the moment. AWWWW Kilig kilig and sickeningly and sugary sweet indeed! Sheesh! I wish I had that same excuse not to take the pill.

Now, after everything has been considered, does anything change my answer?
Proudly, YES!
And my final answer would be... NO I would not take it.
It would be nice and easy to just give in to the urge to make things and life easier but, No, I wouldn't have it any other way. I have come so far and I would not want it any other way.

I am not heterophobic because even if I do not see myself in a serious relationship with a straight male, I still have real and meaningful friendships with the heterosexual male types and they are wonderful wonderful creatures, but I do not think I would be what I am right now if I was not gay. My great great friends would perhaps be not my friends if I was straight. My passions would not have been mine if I was not gay. My drive and my raison de etre's would not be so if I was not gay. My crystal clear convictions would not have been as crystal clear had I not been gay. I wouldn't be where I am right now if I wasn't gay. My homosexuality is not merely a matter of sexual preference.

In short... I wouldn't be ME if I wasn't GAY.



I remember a dear old friend. He was a college professor and we spent wonderful times talking with each other. He lived as a Tibetan Monk and would have been a Grand Acharia (Whatever that means or spelled) before he went back to a 'normal' life when he fell in love with his wife. there is this dance, according to him, that would 'ungay' someone. It is a ritual dance that warriors would do before going to battle. It was called the "TANDAVA". It was a dance that would purportedly increase the production of the male hormone Testosterone. It was, according to him an ancient ritual dance with skulls and daggers, and if taught properly, would eventually 'ungay' a person by increasing his Testosterone and aligning his consciousness to the Masculine Force.


He said that this dance was purportedly taught by Lord SHIVA himself. He also warned me that although some still dance the Tandava, like some members of the Ananda Marga, this is but a 'watered-down' version of the original mystic dance. He said he would guide me and teach me to do it properly should I decide to 'ungay' myself. I remember myself saying no to him. I was and still am happy with what I am then, but I really really gave the offer much thought. He still reminds me every now and then that should I change my mind, the offer still stands. He said that if at any time I feel my homosexuality is causing me unhappiness and I want to 'ungay' myself, he will still be willing to help me. I believe him actually, because he taught me a meditative technique that I still use and is very effective. He told me that this is a meditation technique used by the Monks themselves, in order for them to maintain a prayerful, and almost 'sleepless' life. Done properly, 30 minutes of this meditation technique is equivalent to 8 hours of full sleep. Yes, it does work and has served me well. SO I believe he can teach me the Tandava to Un gay me.



BUT No, thanks. I am happy being me... GAY!

There has been so much study, research, debates and speculations on how the 'gay phenomenon' really is. Some say it has been there since time immemorial, and just not in public view at that time, and simply neglected. Maybe its genetic. Maybe its environmental. Maybe its a choice. Maybe its a triggered reaction. Maybe we're born 'it' or with it. Maybe its Maybeline!



To add to the fray I always say that I think homosexuality is an evolutionary thing. We Homosexuals are the next step in evolution. After all, nature is a sentient being. With the boom of population and worldwide hunger and depletion of resources, Mother Nature did some tweakings of her own to fight it and avoid ultimate destruction. Population rates have to lessen and birthrates have to decline. thus there are storms, typhoons and other 'tragic' catastrophes that eliminate human lives by the thousands. In the same light, thus, FAIRIES were born.




I know it's a bit far off and reek of sci-fi addiction, but hey, I bet the Stone Age man would have the same reaction if he ever thought of the "modern man!" Come on! You know I have a point there! You know that it's sound logic, don't you?

So please, step back, lowly evolved human beings. Make way for the next step in the evolution ladder! Step back and bow before Nature's most potent Force!

As for the 'Ungaying Pill,' thanks but no, thanks... Try selling it to my father. I'm sure he will but it by the crates and try slipping one in my drink! Tee Hee!

Photo Credits:

http://www.thingsyoungerthanmccain.com/mccain-birth-control-viagra/
http://www.niagarapride.ca/resources.htm
http://www.pridecounseling.tv/domestic_violence.html
http://www.twolia.com/blogs/zoboxrox/
http://www.bryanchristiedesign.com/portfolio.php?illustration=279&category=15&open=
http://www.journeyofindia.com/dance/
http://vamsikarra.wordpress.com/2009/05/29/understanding-the-science-of-avatars-in-hinduism/
http://newzar.wordpress.com/2009/05/06/intolerant-poland/
http://phillyist.com/2005/11/11/return_to_sende_17.php
http://badgals-radio.com/?p=2144

Para kay Z - free writing daw to!

Try natin ang free writing na yan!

Simulan natin sa isang mensahe para kay Z:

Ayoko na!

Napapagod na ako.

Sa loob ng isang taon lang nakailang lipatan ka na ba?

Nakailang sunod na din ako sa yo.

Ngayon naman, lilipat ka na naman.

Nakakapagod din naman ang sundan sundan ka sa kung saan saang lupalop ka nag lilipat lipatan.

Sawa na ako na lagi na lang bubuntot buntot sa yo.

Kaya ayoko na! Tama na! Ayoko nang sundan ka sa kung saan ka na naman lilipat.

Dito lang ako. Ayokong sumunod!


ETCHOS LANG!

Wala na si Farrah

Actually tinatamad lang ako mag update ng links sa bagong bahay ni Zen at wala lang din akong maisulat. Kahit namatay na si Mit-tsa-el wala namang kamatayan ang kanyang mga awitin at musikang pinasikat. Tulad ng mga boses bata nyang tugtugin na hindi na rin maibabaon sa limot ng panahon. Lola na rin si Farah at ang Anghel ay kailangan na ring itabi ang kanyang mga pakpak at mag pahinga. Paalam sa inyong dalawa.

Ugatpak

Meanwhile ang Mambabatchoy naman ay naghahanda na sa pag lagay muli ng kanyang ugatpak at tulad ng isang matipunong Mulawin ay naghahanda na ring lumipad sa papawirin upang tuklasin ang nasa dako pa roon at habulin ang mga ulap ng pangarap at mabuhay ng malaya at para sa sarili. Sori na lang at di ako marunong mag plawta o mag silindron kaya wala tayong sawn epeks.

Orchestrated Ignorance

Sa dinami dami ng instrumentong musikal ni isa wala akong alam tugtugin. Pramis kahit triangle, cow bell o tambourine di ako marunong tumugtog. Dalawang sequence lang din ang alam ko sa lyre; yung para sa consecration, at para sa pag announce ng komunyon. . Dalawang sequence lang din sa kampanilya; yung mabilis at yung mabagal, at tatlong sequence sa kampana; para sa kasal/pista/Gloria, para sa patay/requim/lent at para sa panimula/pagtatapos/emergency.Nalaman ko lahat to nung sakristan mayor pa ako sa simbahan. Oo, sakristan ang mambabatchoy. Saulado ko pa ang Roman Misal sequence, pati na rin ang kulay ng mga solemnities at seasons sa Ordo. Kailangan kasi alam mo yun para tama ang maihandang vestments ng pari.

Hindi ko maalalang kailangan itaas ang 'palda' ni Father

As I have said, bobo ako sa myusik. Pano naman kasi, lahat ata ng pagkakataong matuto ako ng instrumento, lahat ata traumatic or distractions.

You're so Grand Beybeh!

Una, nag enroll ako sa piano nung elementary. Kakapalo ng titser ko sa kamay ko, one time, dinalhan ko rin ng pambambo. Nung napuno na ako, pinalu-palo ko din sya ng todo hataw. Letche, eh nagbayad ako para matutong mag piano, hindi para mabaog ang mga daliri. Hayun,
sinumpa nya ako na never matututo ng kahit anong instrumento.

In your arms like a Spanish Guitar! Caliente!

Next na sinubukan ko, gitara. Aktwali, lover ko noon ang nagtyagang magturo sa akin. Sinabihan nya ako na dapat daw putulan ko kuko ko kasi mas madali yun. Sabi ko naman saka na. Minsan, pinatulog nya lang ako, pinutol nya mga kuko ko. Nainis ako kasi parang walang respeto naman yun di ba? Ayun, binasag ko yung gitara nya. Kalaunan, binasag nya rin ang puso ko, panabla siguro.

Rhythm never got me

Sinubukan ko ring mag drums. May sariling mga utak ang kanan at kaliwang kamay ko. ayaw sumunod at mag tyempo. Saka, bobo din ako sa beat. Ultimo Bombo hindi ko mapag tayming. Saka, mabibingi ata ako dun eh. Lagi akong pinagagalitan ng titser kasi pag tinatanong ako, lagi ko lang sgaot ..."ehhh?" Ayoko mabingi noh!

Leave me Fretless

Last na sinubukan ko, violins. ambisyoso ko no? Eh gitara nga di ko maaral, yun pa kaya. Pero ok lang kasi nga kyutipie ang titser. At dahil nga siguro, kyutipie din ako, walang violinan na nangyari. Ibang lagarian ang naganap. eh malay ko ba naman na masasarapan pala sya nung perstaym nya itry mag bottom for me. Ayun... hanggang ngayon kinukulit kulit pa din akong mag jer pag sawa na sya sa bottom nyang jowa at gustong nyang magpa bottom na! Letche!

Siguro nga tatanda na lang akong bobo sa musika. Speaking of tanda, kung ako ang tatanungin nyo, mas makisig si Dakila (Eddie G) kesa kay Aguiluz (Richard) sa Mulawin. Hekhekhek.

Dakila

Dahil mahilig nga ako sa mas matanda sa akin, nagtatanong ang mga kaibigan ko; kung ang mahilig daw sa bata ay pedophile, (walang koneksyon kay MJ pramis) ano naman ang tawag sa mahilig sa matanda (wala din koneksyon kay Farah)?

Ano nga ba? Geriaphile? Kaloka ang nga sagot ng mga kaibigan ko.

- Lion-O (kasi thundercats sya)

- Undertaker (taga hukay kasi ng libingan)

- Juraphile (as in Jurassic)

- Beneficiary (naman to oh!)

Pero ang pinakapaborito ko ay

Archeologist! Mwahahahaha!

Well, saan na ba tayo dinala ng libreng agos ng utak ko? anjan ka pa ba? Huy!

Errr... ayoko na! Subukan ko na tugtugin ang organ ko. Nyekhekhekhek!

Photo Credits:

http://generocha.com/fineart/dreamscape1.html
http://www.co.carver.mn.us/departments/LWS/how_you_can_help!!.asp
http://www.flickr.com/photos/emdot/96674873/
http://www.sfcreate.co.uk/illus/music.html
http://lefteyeonthemedia.wordpress.com/2008/10/23/do-republicans-care-if-anybody-is-smarter-than-a-third-grader/catholic-mass-02/
http://www.webweaver.nu/clipart/music/piano.shtml
http://www.lakewoodconferences.com/catalog/46/1034/285903/sell_classical_guitar.html
http://cnx.org/content/m14533/latest/
http://www.adelaidescottishfiddleclub.com.au/public_national.shtml
http://www.igma.tv/gwi/programs/28/Aguiluz

Brink

Some things happen and I feel like a cyclone with all the centrifugal force of emotions counter acted by the centripetal force of my intellect.

I guess people reach their brink, and before they fall over the edge, instinct kicks in and survival skills come unbidden in an automatic and autonomic response.


What am I saying really?

Some times, you just get enough of bidding your time till you earn your chance to live life and set yourself free. Sometimes, things have to be robbed away from you in order for you to realize that you can not afford to be stripped off of what really matters most; the core of being the "YOU" that you are.

I have reached the brink, and I do not want to fall over the edge. this Batchoy Boi is now taking steps to a brave and bold dash to where the future is uncertain, but will definitely be a test of tensile strengths, character and kitsch!

The Batchoyan may take a slow back seat and become less active perhaps, until things normalize in the wake of a sudden storm of fate and faith.

Without further explanations, I have decided to take control of my own happiness and my own struggle to live and not simply exist.

Manila, here I come...

Bad News and then some

As much as possible I don't want to post bad news on my blog, but this week, Iloilo City had a dose of bad news.

Swine Flu... Oink

First, the swine flue virus has reached Iloilo. DOH officials confirmed Wednesday that an Ilonggo seaman who came home from his tour of duty has tested positive for A(H1N1) Virus. ISKEYREEE.... the news that was officially put out to the media was that he is confined at a certain hospital in the city, but truth of the matter is, he was first confied at a different hospital. My sister, who happens to be a nursing student in the said hospital told me so. In fact, they are now doing contact tracing...ISKEYREEEIER! That day, I had a dip in the newly fixed and filled pool in the house, After the dip, I felt chilly and now, I think I'm coming down with a flu too... ISKEYREEEIESST!!!

Zoonowg at Dawn

Secondly, I came fresh from witnessing a conflagration in the city. The Old Alegro Theater building caught fire earlier, at around 2 AM, Nocturnal me, I was able to watch the fire raze the building that used to house the theater complex, and is now being used as stockrooms for the businesses on the ground level, such as a pawnshop, a Chinese fast food, and some Korean surplus shop. Personally, the fire has affected me in a way, since the old theater house is one of the venues planned for the photo shoot of the latest nude photo session being cooked up by my good friend, photographer Babak Niaraki. Together with step brother Peter, we watched as the valiant and heroic firefighters and volunteers from the Federation Fire Team and ICAG Fire fighters fought for more than 3 hours to put out the fire. I thought all the while that fire fighting was a bore but I was wrong... Oh, well the hosing down was really boring, but those Chinese chamber fire fighting squad was a sight to behold... Chubby chinitoness all around wet, sweaty and well... uhmmm, all hosing down! Hehehehehe... I hear Barbie Almalbis in the background singing, I wanna put out your fayar! I wanna put it out put it out... Nyehehehehe... Well them babies of mine were a heroic bunch! Papa Luis is so so so Proud of yah my babies! Nyekhekhekhek!

Them Papa Luis' Beybis putting it out!

Despite the bad news, on the personal front, things keep getting better.

First, the Anthology Patubas 2 that I am helping out with is slowly gaining momentum. Submissions are slowly pouring in and so far, the manuscripts are excellent. for you guys who are still planning to contribute, you still have until the 15th of July to do so. Do not forget to send in translations for non English/Filipino works as well as your short narrative bio and pictures for the contributors page. For details check out the older blog post.


Secondly, the parents went back to the US of A for the next round of their immigration process. In no time at all, the parents will have full status and will be able to come hither and thither to the US of A. Missing them would be a slight itsy bitsy inconvenience though.

Charm with Cherish Naysha

Thirdly, Charmita my Sanity is in town.... wooot wooot... now excuse me, I need a bit of shut eye. I had an eyeful of Chubby Chinito's and my imagination is kinda carrying me away now. Besides, I need my sleep in preparation for the all-nighter with my Charmita... Tah tah!

Ps.: Oh and yes, here's proof that things are really looking up... I am smoldering in these pics, methinks.... Kssssshhhhh!!!! Was achulli kinda afraid to see the fire fighting thinggie cause I might contribute to the conflagration! Chos!

Tago bilbil pose!

Everything is looking up!

Photo Credits:

http://www.healthspablog.org/
http://howyoudoin.wordpress.com/2007/11/13/usa-making-me-lonely/

Patubas Dos

CALL FOR SUBMISSIONS FOR PATUBAS 2 – LITERARY ANTHOLOGY

Ten years after the release of Patubas – An Anthology of West Visayan Literature, published by the National Commission for Culture and the Arts and edited by Palanca Hall of Famer, Dr. Leoncio Deriada, the Capiz Council for Culture and the Arts (CCCA) headed by Bryan Mari Argos, through it’s literary division, Yanggaw Capiz Writers’ Group (YCWG), headed by Marcel Milliam will again take the initiative of instrumentalizing the publication of Patubas 2.

Responding to the growth of the literary corpus in the region, Patubas 2, which will still be edited by Dr. Leoncio Deriada, will feature works from budding and established regional writers from the period of 1990 to the present. The project coordinators hope to include in this volume a good sampling of pieces representative of the robust condition of literature in Region VI.

The CCCA along with the YCWG invites all writers from Western Visayas, whether residing in the region or residing outside the region but are originally from Western Visayas to submit pieces in any language. The pieces may be poetry, short fiction, non-fiction, drama (preferably one-act), excerpts from longer works like novels and full-length plays and screenplays, and should include translations for non-English or Filipino pieces. Each writer is encouraged to submit 3-5 short pieces or 1-2 longer pieces (excluding translations for non-English/Filipino pieces) to allow the editor as well as the project coordinators to decide which pieces to include in the anthology. Submissions should also be accompanied by a 150-200-word narrative description of the author as well as a picture. All submissions should be in .doc or .rtf format and should be sent as an email attachment to patubas2@gmail.com not later than July 15, 2009. Only submissions sent through email will be entertained.

The project, which will be entered as a proposal for the National Commission for Culture and the Arts (NCCA) competitive grants program will hopefully see publication in 2010.

For more information, please contact Bryan Mari Argos through cell phone number (0920) 9499622 or Marcel Milliam through cell phone number (0918) 9248460, or write to the email address indicated above.

Padayun ang pagtib-ong sang rehiyunal nga literatura!

Fare Thee Well Zafiro

Zafiro L. Ledesma II

The Culture and Arts community mourns the loss of one shinning disciple, patron, compatriot and prime mover in the scene.


Last June 01. 2009, at the first day of the new month, Zafiro L. Ledesma II was found in his room, dead. The body was in a position that would lead one to conclude that he had trouble breathing and was gasping for air. The doctors pronounced him dead on arrival due to cardiac and respiratory problems.

Zaffy as he is fondly called is the curator and head of the Museo Iloilo. The news saddened and shocked the community. Just the week before that, he was busy with preparations for the improvement and renovation of the Museo Iloilo, by way of a grant given by the NCCA. Zaffy has been a tireless worker and a believer in local culture, regional pride and all the art disciplines and the developing, showcasing and furthering of the same in the region. He has slowly attracted artists from all walks of life to come to the Museo. Most arts group finds home and refuge in the Museo Iloilo.

Mga Binalaybay Kang Paghigugma, J.E I Teodoro's book, launch @ Museo Iloilo

I have always shied away from the Museo as I have seen how the visual arts group seem to have hogged the place as a venue cum gallery for their exhibitions. Not until I attended a book launching for Mother John Iremil Teodoro's Book of Kinaray-a Love poems "Mga Binalaybay Kang Paghigugma" (Poems of Love). Then on, more books from Libro Agustino were launched at the Museo Iloilo. eventually, when I was tasked to coordinate and launch Mama Felino S. Garcia Jr.'s debut book of love poetry "Heartsong and other poems," I considered launching it in Museo Iloilo. The place was just perfect. The space is intimate yet not too small nor cramped, the location is right smack at the heart of the City, it being along Bonifacio Drive, and yes, Zaffy was a fuss free and easily approachable person.

"Heartsong and Other poems" By Felino S. Garcia Jr. Launched @ Museo Iloilo

I always thought him to be a bit 'strict' and 'traditional' and I had doubts if he would allow a blatantly 'gay' book to be launched there, but with the success of Mother John's launch, I braved the odds. With his very Hispanic feature, aquiline nose, piercing eyes and lanky stature, I was a bit hesitant. Much to my surprise, he was a very easy fellow to deal with and he was very supportive of Ilonggo Writers, and the Literary Group. I did not have any problems booking the place, and the whole thing took less than ten minutes. The remainder of the time I spent with him was spent talking about the state of Literature in the city, as well as, well... pleasantly surprising, smoking over small talk. He was very accommodating and supportive. My fears all melted into oblivion, as his staff was equally easy to deal with, fuss free and very supportive. My whole idea for the launch was for it to be a 'slumber party' of sorts, since "Heartsong" as used by Mama Felino refers to the melodious snores of the beloved. The set up went without any hitch at all, and he had minimal restrictions for the venue and he gladly offered every possible resource the Museo had. From then on, Literary events that came to my hands found a new home. Much that the Regional Literary Summit that my group got from the NCCA was also held at the Museo, as well as other literary or cultural events that I was handling. During those times, I came fresh from my Palanca win, and as he saw me approach, he greeted me in a loud voice "Hail! Here approaches the newest and freshest addition to Ilonggo Pride! Palanca Awardee and the Future of Hiligaynon Literature! Roll out the red carpet and give him a chair. the Museo Iloilo is honored to be visited by such literary luminary!" I chuckled, but felt myself beam with joy and pride for the warmth.

1st Western Visayas Regional Literature Summit Held @ Museo Iloilo

The week before that, I dropped by the Museo. We had a talk, as usual, over cigarettes, and he was telling me of the renovations that have been taking a bit too long in starting. He was asking me about any recent 'activities' I was handling, or if I came to book another event in the Museo. I just told him that I missed the place and the people, and I came from the Iloilo Hall of Justice, my other 'life' and just decided to drop by for a visit. I was even encouraging him to ask for a grant, after this one, to improve the facilities of the Museo. During events, we would make do with the Karaoke of the Museo, so I told him that, maybe, it was about time to ask for a 'decent' sound system, audio-visual equipment, such as speakers, amps, projector. Wide screen TV, CD/DVD Player, and file videos of 'cultural' stuff that can be used for film showings, lectures and other events in the near future. He was open to the idea, and I promised to help him with the proposal should he start on it. He wanted to 'sponsor' or launch a writing awards, much like the Palanca, for Hiligaynon Writing. He wanted a big prestigious event, and he wanted to name it either as the 'Magdalena Jalandoni Prize, or the Museo Iloilo Prize for Literature. I jokingly told him, "Why not call it the Zaffiro Ledesma Prize?" He cheerfully replied, "Hoy, indi pa ko patay para magka Memorial Awards ha! (Hey, I'm not yet dead to have a Memorial Awards for Literature in my honor).

Night shot of Museo Iloilo during the wake

He was also joking me that the next time, if I do the whole 'slumber' concept again, we should get a full sized bed, and maybe feature a 'live show' of a couple doing it. So gay! We both laughed and snickered at the idea. I also joked that no matter how beautiful the concept or the set up was, he is no where to be found during the event and would not be there. He promised that he would be in attendance if it would be my own book that would be launched already. He told me that with the distinctions I have won lately, it is high time I come out with my own collection. It warmed my heart to have a believer in him.

Museo Iloilo Logo

Now he's gone. Back to the arms of the Master Scribe, up above and beyond the skies, to reap the rewards of a life well lived and dedicated to culture and the Arts, and today, June 13, we bid goodbye to this great guy. He was cremated in a very solemn and intimate ceremony. I look back and take stock of future plans we have with Museo Iloilo as the backdrop. I wrote my first ever shot at a one-act play for fellow stage actors who miss theater, and we were planning to mount it just right outside Museo Iloilo. If ever this should push through, it should be in a way, a tribute for the great man that was Zaffy. There is a certain fear and apprehension in my heart, and wish is that, whoever takes Zaffy's place at the Museo Iloilo, would be as supportive, sympathetic and open as he was to activities for Culture and the Arts, most specifically, Literary Arts.

As I visited the last night of his wake, I made a vow. One day, when I finally launch my first book, it must be at the Museo Iloilo, and I know that Zaffy would be there, smiling and proud of how far I have come, bed or no bed in the set up.

Zaffy, painting by Momo Dalisay

Thank you Zaffy, for a life that has been a gift to all of us; for being a source of strength and support, and inspiration to all of us, whose lives you have touched. Pahuway nga dayun, kag Himaya sa Kalangitan Sir Zaffy! Hidlawun gid kami sa imo!

Photo Credit for Iloilo Museo Logo:

http://www.skyscrapercity.com/showthread.php?t=392322&page=17

SanAg7 Part 2 of 2 - Review Day

SanAg7's Wonderful Cover... My Favorite Cover Artwork in the Series so far

There was no better day to read a wonderful folio. The day was just perfect to get cozy and dig into a good anthology. The weather was great. Not too hot and not to cold, and there were no pending engagements to snatch me away from reading. Plus, there were these wonderful and delicious companions while reading...

In a writer's life, some sun must shine!

And of course, what else should be there to complete everything but coffee... So, with these in tow, I settled in my fave spot and read away.

Beautiful Artwork/Tattoo Design

To understand why I am ecstatic about SanAg Folio, read the previous post. This edition of the Folio features a beautiful artwork by Ervin M. Rondez Jr., a self taught artist from Hamtic Antique. It features the mythical Sarimanok/Adarna bird with wings outstretched, and seemingly protecting a young maiden covered in the traditional 'pintados' tattoo with sprouting foliage. Though the cover may just be black and white, this is perfectly and tastefully done so as to highlight the wonderful artwork. When I checked on the bio of the artist, it says that his ultimate ambition is to become a tattoo artist. I would gladly let him do my next tattoo should I become ready for it. I can only hope to have captured properly the beautiful cover design.

My Manding - Glenn Sevilla Mas... Medyo Crush ko pa naman sana dahil chubby, kaso tiyahin ko sya kasi 'kapatid sya ng literary mother ko na Si John Iremil Teodoro eh, incestuous naman yun noh... Tsk tsk tsk... sayang! Hehehehe

This issue is but a 'Press Filler' as Mr. Jigger Latoza has said, but it contains to full length and very powerful works. The first one is a full length play entitled Games People Play by Glenn Sevilla Mas. This play won 2nd prize in the 2007 Carlos Palanca Memorial Awards for Literature, and was presented in a stage reading during Tanghalang Pilipino's 2001 Virgin Labfest in the Tanghalang Aurelio Tolebntino at the Cultural Center of the Philippines. The play beautifully tackles childhood, friendship, sexuality and sexual awakening, dysfunctional/absent parents and the cruelty of life, especially to children. The narrative is rich and artistically told through the motiff of fairy tales and children's games. As I was reading through the play, I imagine myself playing one of the characters, as this is an 'actor's play.' There are only three characters in the play, Julio, Luna and Diego, but they are very challenging roles, as the three characters themselves alternately play other 'characters' such as the parents of the charcaters and their younger selves. There arae even parts where a male character, julio for example, plays Luna's Neurotically Religious Mother. It excites the stage actor in me, and the story line is rich and very textured, but perfectly contratsed to a very minimalist set with only lights and minimal props relying on effective 'area acting' to get the play thorugh, in an actual production. Glenn Mas delivers yet another powerful play with this one. Syempre pa, I am proud of the author, as he is my literary mother John Iremil Teodoro's 'sister'; hence, he is my aunt, and Manding Glenn delivers yet another proof as to why he has Nine Palancas a Ford Foundation Scholarship for his MFA in Playwritting, and three books of plays. Glenn, after all is another outstanding and powerhouse literary gem of Western Visayas.

Half the book done, half the box too... Weeee

The second manuscript is a scrrenplay entitled Hula: Higit Pa Sa Mga Tala by Lorenzo Fuentes Templonuevo. The author uses the mottif of astorlogy, particularly the Zodiac Signs in his screenplay. The whole screenplay has an 'indie' feel to it, very cinematographic story telling, and a nice ending to bring everything to an 'agreeable' conclussion. Although there is an 'indie' feel to the story, the whole thing has 'pop' elements in it, and tackles later on in the story the dilemma between working abroad as opposed to volunteering for humanitarian work in the war torn fields of Mindanao. The former being the more 'zodiacal' choice, while the latter runs cintrary to what is predicted for the character, as inferred from and dictated by her birth charts. Although the story becomes a bit 'formulaic' and predictable at some point, maybe that's just me.

All in all, the book is a wonderfull read, and not only for the purpose of reading per se, but would also be helpful for me as a writer if and when I would decide to give play writting or scrrenplay writting a shot.

Another 'press' of Java... My personal French Coffee Press fro Starbucks - given by a friend for my birthday a long time ago.

P.S: Should you be interested in getting a copy of this issue of SanAg or any other issue for that matter, as well as titles from Libro Agustino, and titles by Mother John Iremil Teodoro, leave me a message and I will be more than willing to make arrangements for you on how you can buy them. I am not an official 'agent' of any of the above named persons and entities, but for the sake of Literature and spreading Hiligaynon/Western Visayan Literature, I would be more than happy to help you get your copies. Spread the word.

Glenn Sevilla Mas' Photo Copied from:

http://www.geocities.com/phil_writers/mas_glenn

SanAg7 Part 1 of 2 - The Literary Journ(ey)al

Beautiful Cover Art by Ervin M. Rondez Jr.

I gathered from Mother John Iremil Teodoro's blog that SanAg7 just got out hot off the press. I rushed over the next available office day to grab me a copy. I was excited because this is to be the first issue that would feature me 'on the other side of the fence. It's like this, kasi.

SanAg, which literally means 'bright', is the Official Literary Folio of the University of San Agustin, Iloilo's Fray Luis De Leon Creative Writing Desk, under the University's Coordinating Center for Research and Publication. It was published by the in-house publishing house Libro Agustino. SanAg also happens to be the shortened 'slang' for San Agustin; San-Ag.

Last year, with the change in the Administration, almost all 'artistic' centers were bulldozed by the new Father President, as these things were not his priority for the University, thus the Writing Desk and the Publishing House suffered greatly. Such was also, in part, the reason why my dear beloved literary mother decided, in an act of indignation, to divorce herself from the job that she has nurtured, loved, and toiled at and with, for more than seven years.

When I was awarded a fellowship in the first ever Fray Luis De Leon's Regional Creative Writing Workshop, as a fellow in poetry, I was asked by mother John to submit some of my works for the 2nd issue of SanAg, and the rest was history, so they say. Year in and year out, mother would always ask for my works, and would publish them in the folio. I had works published in SanAg3, SanAg4, and SanAg5, SanAg6 was dedicated to drama and I can not remember if I did submit for this one, but the poitn is, I have always looked forward to this folio. This is where I got my first taste of being 'paid' for my poems, and saw them published alongside Ilonggo Literary greats such as Tatay Dr. Leoncio P. Deriada.

The folio had undergone several transformations and themes. There was an issue that was 'love' themed. There was one for experimental short fiction, an issue for drama, and what nots. One of the features of the folio, aside from being divided into poetry, fiction and drama, was its separate section for the award winning manuscripts. These were usually the crop of works that earned recognition in the Palanca Awards for the year, or any other reputable award giving body in Philippine Literature. As I have said, this issue is important for me because for the first time, my works have finally 'crossed-over' to that section. SanAg has literally chronicled my journey as a Hiligaynon wirter. From mere 'budding' contributor of a couple of poems, to a submission of a short experimental fiction, to an 'awarded' writer. More importantly, with the publishing and the writing desk 'shelved', this might just be SanAg's swan song.

I hurriedly rushed to the 5th floor of the Fray Luis De Leon Building in San Agustin. As I walked the alleyways, nostalgia swept over me. The Hall is also where the College of Law is located. I used to be part of the throng of young and aspiring lawyers to be in this hall. Whew!

Catching my breath upon reaching the floor after flights of stairseseseseses, my heart skipped to see the UCRP Office still open even if it was way past five in the afternoon. I hurriedly went inside. Fortunately, I was able to catch Mr. Jigger Latoza, the Center's Director. I quashed an urge to look for Mrs. Medel, who always graciously gave me my complimentary copy, have me sign in and gave me my 'honoraria' for the works published, and much so, go into the inner sanctums for a chat with my beloved Mother. Luckily, the chit chat with Mr. Latoza was enough distraction. Not enough, however, to keep me from opening the book and instantly checking the table of contents and quickly jumping over to the 'About The Contributors' page. This page has also seen my bio's gradual transformation.

I panicked a bit to learn that my name was not in it. A quick thought popped in to my head; that perhaps, due to Mother John's hasty exit and quick move back to Manila, she might have forgotten to include my works. My heart sank. I couldn't help but be very disappointed. I quadruple checked and noticed that the Author's page only contained three names. There must be some mistake! I couldn't help but verbalize my perplexed thoughts.

Hearing my concern, Jigger quickly said "Oh, your works are in SanAg 8. That's just a Press Filler. It has one full length play and one screenplay. He further informed me that SanAg8 is already in the press and in no time, will also be coming out. I felt relieved! Patience, will have to be, a virtue, till then. I took two books; one for me, and one for my Dynamic Duo Bryan, as was always the case. I was glad I was not carrying anything that time except my clutch bag. The cover is too beautiful not to display, but that's getting ahead of the next post. I will review the book in my next post.

Pagtukib

Paagtukib is a Hiligaynon term which means 'to discover'. I am amazed how information is readily available especially with the information super highway that is the web. Information and its discovery is just a click away, and at the touch of a button. Yet, there is still so much ignorance in this world of ours.

Wait! Stop! Pause... before you get the idea that I am a special envoy or ambassador on education, wala lang to... kunyaring intro-introhan lang. Hehehehe

Di na ako mag eexplain kung bakit ganun ang intro pero eto sya... The batchoy boi wrote a new poem last night triggered by a.. malalaman nyo din after reading... hehehehe... enjoy!



Sabat Sa Textmate Nga Nakatukib Sa Google
Sang Akun Pagka Mamamalaybay
(original format)
Ni Luis Batchoy

Sng ndscovr m
Sa Gugol
Na aq prizd
Poet,
Ngdsig bla pitik
Sng hart m?
Dw gnsirban bla
Kaunurn m?
Ms ngwpo bla
N ms ngnmit
Q s pnlukn m?
N glyun k bla
Na horni?
Same ayhn
Sg mafil mo
F imo madscovr
Na open n game aq,
Nmi body n my abs,
Tbsol n gaulbo gd butt
Tmbok n laba buto,
N sgad s bed?
Reply ASAP.


Sabat Sa Textmate Nga Nakatukib Sa Google
Sang Akun Pagka Mamamalaybay
Ni Luis Batchoy

Sang matukiban mo
Sa Google
Nga ako premyado
Nga mamamalaybay,
Nagdasig bala ang pitik
Sang dughan mo?
Daw ginsiraban bala
Ang kaunuran mo?
Mas nag gwapo bala
Kag mas nag namit
Ako sa panulukan mo?
Kag gilayun ka bala
Nga gin utgan?
Anggid ayhan
Sang imo batyagun
Kung imo matukiban
Nga 'open' kag 'game' ako,
Manami ang lawas kag may abs,
Tibsol kag ga ulbo gid ang buli
Tambok kag laba ang buto,
Kag sagad sa kama?
Reply ASAP.

Sagot sa Textmate Na Nakadiskubre Sa Google
Sa Aking Pagka Makata
Ni Luis Batchoy

Nang nadiskubre mo
Sa Google
Na ako premyadong
Makata,
Bumilis ba ang pitik
Ng dibdib mo?
Parang sinisilaban ba
Ang kalamnan mo?
Mas gumwapo ba
At mas sumarap
Ako sa paningin mo?
At bigla ka bang
Nalibugan?
Tulad din kaya
Sa mararamdaman mo
Kung madidiskubre mo
Na 'open' at 'game' ako,
Maganda ang katawan at may abs,
Tibsol at maumbok ang puwit
Mataba at mahaba ang titi,
At magaling sa kama?
Reply ASAP.


Kaya ayoko talaga nakikipag textmates eh. Oh well....

Dali na di Sa'kon... Subong na GID!

Get here!

Tag ulan na ulit. Paminsan minsan sumisilip si haring araw para painitin ang mamasa asang mundo. Don't get me wrong, I love the rains. It's just that, may mga taong nakapaligid sa akin na walang puknat kung makareklamo sa lumbay at lamig ng panahon, lalo't gabi at mahalumigmig din ang hangin. Mga taong tulad ko ay nag iisa sa malambot at mainit init na kama. I really don't mind it kasi nga sabi ko mas madaming bagay na dapat pagtuunan ng pansin at lately, productive ako. Maramiraming tula din ang naisilang ng malikot at makulit kong hiraya. Pero dahil nga daw nakakahawa ang 'negativity', sige na nga, magpaka depress depressan tayo. Itong kanta na to, I love forever. Pasensya na at wala akong makitang matinong bidyo kaya pagtyagaan na lang tong nasa baba. Hmmm...



Song therapy daw ang tawag dito. Mag reflect sa mga kanta at magmuni muni. Sa poetry, explication ang tawag; synthesis reading... Pero tong susunod na gagawin ko ay di ganun ka academic... okray lang... heheheheh... malamig ag ulan kasi at nagiisa ang batchoy boi kaya eto, kulitan tayo.

GET HERE By Oleta Adams
*Pambabaoy ala AH1N1 ni Luis Batchoy


You can reach me by railway, you can reach me by trailway
* Sayang at hindi natuloy ang pag rerehabilitate ng Panay Railways, the oldest Railway system in Asia, dito sa Iloilo/Panay, kaya witels ka pedeng sumakay ng Train to reach me... shalan shalan pag trailways, napaka trekker ng drama mo, kung sino ka man.

You can reach me on an airplane, you can reach me with your mind
*Medyo mahal pero may promo fares,at Go Lite naman kaya keri. Malayo na ang airport ngayon samin. Dati kasi nasa kabilang kanto lang ng bahay namin. Oh well.. Napaka Psychic naman ng drama kung mind connections ang moda natin... Tantric Sex ba ito?

You can reach me by caravan, cross the desert like an Arab man
*with matching camels, elephants and all that jazz ba itoh? Arabo ka bah? Ahmmm... Ewww... pero kung marami kang dalang mga 'pasalubong' such as ginto, alahas and all that 'Bektaz' much, then pedeng magreconsider. Pero alam mo, ang mga arabo ngayon, naka Benz na kaya, upgrade your mode of transpo please lang, oh and don't forget to deodorize ok?

I don't care how you get here, just- get here if you can
*Go go go na! Kaya mo yan! Framis!


You can reach me by sailboat, climb a tree and swing rope to rope
*Una, si Sinbad ka, tapos biglang si Tarzan ka? Kaloka kah! Sino ka ba talaga? Pero kung naka Yacht ka mas shalan shalan... cruise cruise itey!

Take a sled and slide down slow, into these arms of mine
*Ngayon naman, si Santa Claus ka? Hmmm sabagay bet ko ang Chubby! And I have been very naughty, kaya, hmmm pede na. Pero mag ahit ka ok?

You can jump on a speedy colt, cross the border in a blaze of hope
*Ay! Kabayuhan itey! Hmmm... Braveheart ikaw ba yan? At talagang may 'blaze of hope'? How exciting!

I don't care how you get here, just- get here if you can
*Demanding naman masyado, da va? Hehehe.. Tigang na siguro kasi!



There are hills and mountains between us
*Ay! Magpaka Julie Andrews ba tayo at kumanta ng Da heeeeellllsss are alayv with the sound of myooosik, makes the people come together!" Ehehehe... baka naman sa kabilang bundok ka lang ng Madyaas. Antique? Capiz? Hmmm... Baka NPA ka!

Always something to get over
*Magaling ako sa getting over na yan! Ako bahala! Hehehe

If I had my way, then surely you would be closer
*Hindi lang Closer, as in closest pa! Or Closesesest!

I need you closer
* NOW NA!

(interlude, then repeat bridge)
*Ladies and gentlemen, the rythm section1 Palakpakan!


You can windsurf into my life, take me up on a carpet ride
*Cam Sur? Boracay? Shalan... now sing with me... 'A whole new waaaaaarld!'

You can make it in a big balloon, but you better make it soon
*Napaka Jules Verne naman netoh! Kanta ulit... 'Would you like to ride in my byootifoool valooon?'

You can reach me by caravan, cross the desert like an Arab man
*Naubusan ng linya ang songwriter, I'm sure...redundancy ang drama!

I don't care how you get here, just- get here if you can
* Kanina tigang, ngayon desperado na! Nagagawa nga naman ng lack of tootooot!

I don't care, I dont care, I need you right here right now
*Wait lang, nasa labas ang nanay at tatay ko... hehehehehe

I need you right here, right now, right by my side (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)
*At natural na mag kaka yeah yeah moment talaga! Shempre noh!

I don't care how you get here, just- get here if you can.
* Yun na yun! Kailangan pa bang imemorize yan?


Lalabas na sana ako pero pakshet umulan na naman at ang sarap sarap ng kama... hahay! Get here na please!?!?! Save me from drowning in to the depths of myself... CHAROS LUCOS!


Eto na lang para fair... Sabihin mo kung nasaan ka kasi... susunduin kita... Hehehehe

Dali na di Sa'kon... Subong na GID!

Photo Credits:

http://www.gifs.net/subcategory/24/0/20/Bones_and_Skulls
http://www.geocities.com/alcogoodwin/PANAY.html
http://halfpastnine.wordpress.com/2008/08/22/jay-tarzan-senior-celeberating-his-26th-birthday/
http://www.memphisflyer.com/blogs/TheaterBlog/
http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1800341783/photo/546508
http://listeninglounge.blogspot.com/2008/09/hitchhike-plan-airs-sept-15.html