Solo (Not the song)

And so, this was how I anticipated the new year.

When I came home, I was glad that one ritual had already been crashed out for me. I start my New Year celebration ritual by whipping my room into shape. Organized shape that is. I was kinda disconcerted to find my room oh so clean it spaced me out! Even the wood floor tiles were buffed and polished! Whoah! I got so disconcerted that I immediately poured out the contents of my trolly bag all askew! More like it! Hehehehe.

After resting a bit, I went out for coffee with some friends, and to buy me my personal gift. This is a yearly ritual for me. During special occasions, such as my birthday, Christmas, New Year, and death anniversary of the latest ex I am mourning as of the moment, I give myself something small yet meaningful. This year, since I managed to pop all the coffee makers I have bought or been given, I decided to buy me a new one. Nothing grand. Just some affordable generic black affair. I also got me coffee grinds, then Panetone from Tinapayan to go with my coffee.

I also bought me some tea light candles, vanilla essence oil, sandalwood incense sticks, a bottle of bubble bath liquid, Chai Spice tea a bouquet of flowers and white taper candles. I also got one pink helium filled balloon. These, except for pillar candle and the balloon, is for one of my new year rituals: a long luxurious bubble bath relaxing in candle light, enveloped by aromatic scents and sipping the tea infusion. I would ransack my closets and hopefully there are some bath salts left from my stash and some bath milk, mineral rocks and lather too. Half of the flowers I arranged into a tall vase so my room would be brighter and well... flowery-er. Half of them, I de-petaled to strew into the bath to make it more, well, spa-ish! Now all that's missing would be a naked chubby chinito Violinist to serenade me. Serenade lang talaga, no sex promise! Well... not until I finish my bath that is hehehehe....

The pillar candle is for my little 'light a candle' for peace ritual. I light it and say a little prayer. Very simple and self-explanatory. The balloon is for my wish release ritual. After writing down my wishes for the new year, I would tie it to a string tied to the balloon. As the new year is ushered in, instead of lighting fire crackers, I would release the balloon to drift towards the heavens!

This year, too, without fail, my little sister Sarah requested me to cook my legendary Spaghetti Carbonara. Before my bath, I made sure it was already done. What got to me was the absence of the usual mess with everyone rushing to and fro and the noises that the holiday spirits bring into the house. Now, it was quieter and more silent. The birds have flown the coop so to speak. It has been quieter already for the past years ever since, one by one, my older siblings have moved to the US of A to live their dreams and raise their families.

Now, it was almost silent. My three younger sibs were nowhere to be found in the house. My little brother is with his wifey and kid. My little sister also with his hubby and kid, and my baby sister, with his boyfie. There was an altercation between baby sis and little sis, and this prompted the exodus.

Although at around 10PM, my older brother, who came home for the Holidays, and little sis came for a visit. I was hopeful that somehow, there would be happy chatter as we usher in the new year later, but I was disappointed when they started bidding goodbye to celebrate their own new years with their own 'families.' Sigh...

And so, there was me, and my mom, my dad, and my mom's sister, who stays with us. Then again, evil as it may seem, I secretly relished the fact that, finally, for the longest time, I am the only one with the privilege of waiting and counting down the new year with our parents. ALL MINE!!! SOLO!!! You see, when you grew up in a brood of seven, you would know what I'm saying. Everyone hogs or competes, or elbows his or her own 'Me' time with the parents. Now, here we are, and I am the one with the singular distinction! AHLAVET! Hehehe...

We took seats on the terrace, the three of us, while we gazed at how the skies were painted with colors and firebursts. As the new year chimed in, we greeted each other, kissed, and hugged, and told each other how we love one another. Again, the SOLO feeling! HAH! ALL TO MYSELF! See, I'm the one left Mom! See, I'm still here DAD! ME! ONLY ME! Smug smug smug! hehehehe... It hit me. So! If this is the pay-off I get for the cosmic shittiness of finding myself still single and unattached, and being the last man standing so to speak among my siblings in the romance department, then it IS one swell pay-off.

And so, Dad raised his glass of Black Label, Mom her champagne,and me, my mug of coffee, to toast the new year!

Here's to A GREAT YEAR Ahead and here's hoping that, in some other aspects, I won't be SOLO for long!

Happy New Year Batchoy Denizens!