And while at it, elsewhere in the lofty halls of Senate, another 'oh so brilliant I am dazed and dazzled' Senator has this to say.
Senate Bill 2639, authored by the highly intelligent Senator Lito Lapid, seeks to regulate and mandate that Billboards be either in English or Filipino only. If it be in a foreign language, it should contain the English or Filipino Translation. He says that signs in other languages 'alienate' the Filipinos. The Senator added, "It is incumbent upon the State to instill and maintain a sense of nationalism among dwellers... We, as Filipinos, should never be subjected to the alienation and seclusion that we are experiencing due to this phenomenon."
Brilliant, right? Now let's start at Binondo and Ongpin, where there is a proliferation of strange calligraphic signs. We don't know that the sign means 'restaurant' right? Or that it means 'internet cafe,' right? Oh and we are sooo alienated! Thank you so much, Senator!
Seeking to ammend Article 248 of the Revised Penal Code, Senate Bill 455 seeks to include all Digital MEdia Practitioners in the Protection afforded by the law.
“With the popularity of blogs and video-sharing websites such as YouTube, there are now a lot of people who regularly post sensitive political commentaries online, with content similar to those traditionally published in newspapers or broadcasted over the television. It is clear that practitioners of the digital media are exposed to the same dangers that print and broadcast media practitioners are exposed to, so they should likewise be given protection by the law,” she said.
Winner ka gid ya Chay! It's only a matter of time, that what I once proposed in this blog become a reality too. The revisiting of other National Laws to include the virtual community online, such as the revising of the Omnibus Elections Code, to include the reality and impact of the cyber community in our political exercise. Mabuhay ka Tiya'y!
Still in blog hiatus but reading the blogs in my list and being the lurker that I always was, I found a link in one of my blog mates. From my friend Aris of the blog Ako si Aris I got this. Well, vanity is my favorite sin, so I gave it a try.
Oh to write like my idol. To write like the Master of the Modern Short Story, father of Suspense and Mystery, Master of the Macabre and Free Verse Poetry!
It tickled my fancy, and gave me my 'happy thought.' Now all I need is pixie dust.
For the moon never beams without bringing me dreams...
Maybe it's because some things need to be fermented before being dished out.
Maybe it's like poetry. When you grow older in the craft your poetry becomes less hysterical or verbose or loud.
Maybe it's self editorializing. The longer you blog, the more you tend to edit/gag yourself.
Maybe it's laziness. The writing it down gets so tiring that you do not want to bother anymore.
Maybe it's prioritization. There's so much going on yet there is nothing to do.
Maybe, it's maybeline.
For my loyal blog denizens who keep coming back, I'm sorry. My keyboard is on hiatus and the blog posts become harder to churn out. Thanks for sticking it out with the batchoyan. Don'tcha worry. I'm still around, and somethings bound to give in. It's gonna happen, happen someday says Liza Minnelli.
When I came home, I was glad that one ritual had already been crashed out for me. I start my New Year celebration ritual by whipping my room into shape. Organized shape that is. I was kinda disconcerted to find my room oh so clean it spaced me out! Even the wood floor tiles were buffed and polished! Whoah! I got so disconcerted that I immediately poured out the contents of my trolly bag all askew! More like it! Hehehehe.
After resting a bit, I went out for coffee with some friends, and to buy me my personal gift. This is a yearly ritual for me. During special occasions, such as my birthday, Christmas, New Year, and death anniversary of the latest ex I am mourning as of the moment, I give myself something small yet meaningful. This year, since I managed to pop all the coffee makers I have bought or been given, I decided to buy me a new one. Nothing grand. Just some affordable generic black affair. I also got me coffee grinds, then Panetone from Tinapayan to go with my coffee.
I also bought me some tea light candles, vanilla essence oil, sandalwood incense sticks, a bottle of bubble bath liquid, Chai Spice tea a bouquet of flowers and white taper candles. I also got one pink helium filled balloon. These, except for pillar candle and the balloon, is for one of my new year rituals: a long luxurious bubble bath relaxing in candle light, enveloped by aromatic scents and sipping the tea infusion. I would ransack my closets and hopefully there are some bath salts left from my stash and some bath milk, mineral rocks and lather too. Half of the flowers I arranged into a tall vase so my room would be brighter and well... flowery-er. Half of them, I de-petaled to strew into the bath to make it more, well, spa-ish! Now all that's missing would be a naked chubby chinito Violinist to serenade me. Serenade lang talaga, no sex promise! Well... not until I finish my bath that is hehehehe....
The pillar candle is for my little 'light a candle' for peace ritual. I light it and say a little prayer. Very simple and self-explanatory. The balloon is for my wish release ritual. After writing down my wishes for the new year, I would tie it to a string tied to the balloon. As the new year is ushered in, instead of lighting fire crackers, I would release the balloon to drift towards the heavens!
This year, too, without fail, my little sister Sarah requested me to cook my legendary Spaghetti Carbonara. Before my bath, I made sure it was already done. What got to me was the absence of the usual mess with everyone rushing to and fro and the noises that the holiday spirits bring into the house. Now, it was quieter and more silent. The birds have flown the coop so to speak. It has been quieter already for the past years ever since, one by one, my older siblings have moved to the US of A to live their dreams and raise their families.
Now, it was almost silent. My three younger sibs were nowhere to be found in the house. My little brother is with his wifey and kid. My little sister also with his hubby and kid, and my baby sister, with his boyfie. There was an altercation between baby sis and little sis, and this prompted the exodus.
Although at around 10PM, my older brother, who came home for the Holidays, and little sis came for a visit. I was hopeful that somehow, there would be happy chatter as we usher in the new year later, but I was disappointed when they started bidding goodbye to celebrate their own new years with their own 'families.' Sigh...
And so, there was me, and my mom, my dad, and my mom's sister, who stays with us. Then again, evil as it may seem, I secretly relished the fact that, finally, for the longest time, I am the only one with the privilege of waiting and counting down the new year with our parents. ALL MINE!!! SOLO!!! You see, when you grew up in a brood of seven, you would know what I'm saying. Everyone hogs or competes, or elbows his or her own 'Me' time with the parents. Now, here we are, and I am the one with the singular distinction! AHLAVET! Hehehe...
We took seats on the terrace, the three of us, while we gazed at how the skies were painted with colors and firebursts. As the new year chimed in, we greeted each other, kissed, and hugged, and told each other how we love one another. Again, the SOLO feeling! HAH! ALL TO MYSELF! See, I'm the one left Mom! See, I'm still here DAD! ME! ONLY ME! Smug smug smug! hehehehe... It hit me. So! If this is the pay-off I get for the cosmic shittiness of finding myself still single and unattached, and being the last man standing so to speak among my siblings in the romance department, then it IS one swell pay-off.
And so, Dad raised his glass of Black Label, Mom her champagne,and me, my mug of coffee, to toast the new year!
Here's to A GREAT YEAR Ahead and here's hoping that, in some other aspects, I won't be SOLO for long!
Yung laptop ko na dati ay madilim ang display, napaliwanag mo. Yung sana'y malamig ko na pasko, napag init at napa lagablab mo. Ang makulimlim kong buhay ay napapaliwanag mo ng bonggang bongga. Yung mga halik mo nakakapawi ng mga lungkot at takot ko. Yung yakap mo, nakakapag aalis ng inis at pagod ko.
Yung cell phone ko na matagal ko na hindi magamit dahil ayaw gumana, naayos at napagana mo. Pati ang gutay gutay ko na na mga pinapangarap sa buhay, naipagtatagpi tagpi mo. Yung mga basag basag ko na na mga hinahangad at di na pinaniniwalaan, na iis-is at napapakinang mo ulit.
Ngayon...
Masisisi mo ba ako kung ayaw ko na ikaw pakawalan pa? Na ayaw ko na ikaw ma experience ng iba? Na gusto ko na lang umuwi sa mga yakap at halik mo?
Masisisi mo ba ako kung gustuhin kong sirain na lang ng bonggang bongga ang buhay ko at ipaayos na lang sa yo?
Etchos lang!
Mas sira sira kaya ang buhay mo kesa sa kin hehehehe
Charing kanding nga nag tambling! Etchos lucos nalumos sa ginamos!
And so the final piece needs to be written. I really was hesitating to write it, but then, some things just have to come full circle. A lot of things happened in the intervening days and weeks since the first post of the After death chronicles was written. And so it comes down to this.
The second ex to be notified is actually more complex and touchy. If it could have been avoided all together, I would. I left a message in his Facebook account. I left my number and asked him to call me or text me so I could call him. I did not want to just drop the bomb like that on facebook messaging. Things like these need a voice. He replied belatedly with a message confirming if it was indeed me writing him a message. I understand. He's an 'otaku' or a tech geek. He is very wary of spams and scams on line. Besides, after the devastating break up, I imposed a total block and freeze over. No contacts. No news. No whatsoever. I refrained from making online trails that he may be able to follow for at least 18 months to get off his radar. No nothing. Only a few months ago was I surprised to find a friend request on facebook from him.
See, JM was his 'kuma-chan,' remember? Yes, he was THAT ex. Well, then we exchanged a few SMS' and I kept it within JM's parameters. No 'how are you's,' no how's life treating you's, just JM this and that. En route JM's burial he called me. He said he just got off the office and was asking where I was. I told him I was with the funeral caravan. He was asking directions and wanted to go but it was too far for him. See, I never asked him to meet up or whatever. I said what I had to say. That JM was gone, where he lies in state, when the funeral would be, and it would be up to him if he wants to make time and pay his final respects. I have done my job. Whatever he does next is none of my concerns and needs not my involvement in any way.
I was surprised to receive a call from him two days after JM's funeral. What now? He said he wanted to see me. He said it was his last work day for the week. He wanted to have coffee. I hesitated. This has nothing to do with JM. Then again, if it's true that I am over him really, then why fear a meet up. Fine!
And so, Starbuck's 6750 it was. I came before him because, though he works in Makati, he does not know his way around. I am now more geographically and navigationally adept than him in the metro. He said he was coming with a workmate friend. Tsch! Buffer! What a scaredy cat! Afraid to face the batchoy all by himself. Well...
I saw him and friend approach from the other side of the road. He looked a bit unkempt than he used too. Heavier, gruffier, and well... pardon me... dirtier. Tsk! The lover, if he has any, has poor 'hubby keeping skills.'
He approached my table. I stood up. Saw him open his arms wide and I just let myself be swept into his embrace. The world did not really stop like a sappy romantic flick. It was warm, it was nice and tight, and his hands and arms still knew the nooks and crannies of my body for maximum contact. No. No death defying nuclear meltdown. Not until he casually leaned his head sideways and comfortably found the perfect spot on my shoulder, nuzzling my neck with his stubble, just like he used to. Then boom!
Fuck it!
And so, we talked. Why this was so, why such was such. He vehemently denied that the reason for the break up was a third party. They never became them. He said the real reason was that because he chickened out. He got so overwhelmed by our plans. We were literally on the edge and he got afraid to take the plunge. The leap of faith! He chickened out on us.
He went on to tell me how he felt that his life after me was one big melodramatic karma. Misfortunes, one after the other. The only thing that softened the blows was that he felt he deserved everything, for breaking my heart into fragments and smithereens. I felt my cheeks dampen. Too bad, but...
SO I agreed to come home with him. He is living in their family's ancestral house now, good stable job, nice hobbies and more or less more matured and driven life. But! The Luis Karma. He was on the tail end of a degrading and disintegrating 3-year relationship. Dependency, bad sex and abuse of favors and kindness. The whole clan of the BF was practically living in their house. Bottomline... Bad sex.
When the doors closed we were all over each other. God! He still knows my body. Where to touch me, how to touch me, when to and when not to. Oh yes, there was sex. Mind blowing sex! Death defying, soul severing, cosmic explosive sex! From the back of the door to the stairs, to the couch, to the showers, to the tub, to bed and beyond. All with the boyfriend and the family in the house and some visiting friends.
He said that his boyfriend's idea to save the bad sex was third wheeling. At first he liked the sexual release but later found it so dirty and started hating himself for it. I would have none of his drama. His situation, his luck, his call. I'm here to just get what I can take. After rounds of sex, while on cool down, he handed me a keychain. In his purry sex-logged voice he asked me to move my things and stay with him here for as long as I need until I get back to my trips for my Dad. How can I say no? Amazing sex? Oh and yes, the boyfriend 'pawed' me too. I consented to it so that if and when we get caught, I'd have a ready slap back. Hello, so you have now become the queen and role model of sexual purity and fidelity? And yes, we did get caught.
Days later, he finally broke up with the boyfriend. He insists that it was a long overdue thing and I had nothing to do with it. Whatever. The set up was perfect. Intimacy, warmth and a blazing Christmas, the I go back to my travels, and then some when I get back. Not until we talked...
Then I realized, I love him. Not with the remnant love or the dying embers rekindled, but with a brand new love for the him that he is right now. You know how love tends to muck up things, right? If this thing was able to survive the cold blast of silence and indifference and the soul sapping drought of no news and no nothing, then this must be something else. This hardy thing must be it!Now I don't want to take what I can get. I want all of it.
But he was not ready for me. He said it was so unfair for me to just drop in and breeze through his life the way I also did six years ago. That he had plans... that he needs time to heal... time to mourn... time to... whatever.
It was not easy. I told him that some people whine, gripe, pray and even coerce for a shot at something. We were so lucky to have been given two shots at it.
Then again... maybe this is really the message of the universe. He has to take his own flights. I have to take mine. Love just muddles it all up.
And one more thing does.
The promise we made that no matter what, he and I will always be there. No getting lost. No news block out. This. For now...
Looks like I made myself another one of those that defies labels or classifications. Well... We'll see...
So what are we? I asked. FuBu? Friends with benefits? He said, "why the need to label." I replied, "Fine, not FuBu not friends with benefits." He asked, "what then." Friends with Privileges. Yes. Thats new!
He says he's Nelly Fortado's "I'm like a bird." I said no... you're not a bird. Though you have a very nice one, hehehe. You are a butterfly.
