Thursday, April 23, 2009

Cruelty




Why is the world so cruel?

Nagkakape kami ng isang close friend kanina. Sa kabilang table may grupo ng mga pamhin. Buff-buff-an ang moda ng mga sisters nyo at shemperz dahil summah, naka flimsy shirt and shorts lang sila. Pansinin ang pasimpleng pag fi-flex flex habang inaabot ang kanilang drinks.
Boring...

Bigla, may napansin akong isang kyutipie na naglakad papalapit sa grupo. Now that's more like it! Kyut naman ni kuya.Bilugan. Sarap sarap yakapin! Biglang blazing hot summer na talaga. Binati sya ng mga kasama sa table.

"Hey Dude! Why are you late?"

"Dude! Tang'na, antaba taba mo na ah! Hit the gym pare! Yuck!"

"Pare kasi, stop eating to much!"

"Dude, Oink oink ka na! Chinese ka ba? Naniniwala kang swerte kasi Year of the Pig?"

"Pawis ba yan pare o mantika?"

Mega super duper kutya ang inabot ni chubby sa kanyng grupo. Ewan ko lang kung narinig nila ang mahinang sagot ni kyuti chubby sa kanilang mga tira...

"Pare Chef ako eh, no one trusts a thin chef..."


HALLER!

Magsitigil kayong lahat! Anchachaka nyo kayang lahat noh! Si kuyang chubby chef kaya ang pinaka kyut sa inyong lahat! Atchaka, narinig nyo yun? Chef si kuya! Trabaho nya ang gumawa ng masarap na pagkain. Passion nya yun! ansakit nyo magsalita ha! Kuya Chubby lika, dito ka na lang sa tabi ko... hayaan mo sila! Tell me, what's your specialty dish. Kelan mo ko ipagluluto?

Oh well...

Cruel ng world noh?

I have nothing against gym rats and health buffs. Katawan nila yan. Karapatan nilang gawin ang gusto nilang gawin sa mga katawan nila.

Para ring sagot ko sa dating etchoserang madreng teacher sa Theo subject nung College ako.

Sister: Mr. Batchoy, what's with all the piercings in your body? Why? They look so dirty. Remove that tongue ring at once!

Me: Sister, with all due respects, I have learned in my basic Cathechesis classes in Elementary that the body is the temple of the Holy Spirit.

Sister: Exactly! So keep it clean and holy! What are you trying to do?

Me: Sister, that is exactly my point! I am decorating it! Now if you wish that yours will be a mere chapel with nothing in it but a small statuette, thats your choice. As for me and my body, I want it to be a Cathedral, or a Basillica! I even want it to be not just a pilgrimage site, but a tourist attraction that would attract not only the faithfulls, but even those who are from different faiths as well. I rest my case!


Kaya I respect every one's decision on what to do with their bodies. Kanya kanyang kemverlou yan! Ang kinakairita ko lang, kailang ba talaga lahat na lang ng tao ay buff? Kailangan ba mag feel bad ang mga taong nadadagdagan ang timbang o lumalapad ang waistline? Stop! This is personal! This is deprivation! Pano na kaming market ang mga chubby! Kawawa naman kami! Hindi ito makatarungan! Kung ang lahat na lang ng tao ay magpapayat at mag gygym, ano na lang ang kakainin ng mga tulad namin? Let me say that again. This is deprivation! Hehehehe...

Pero seriously, it is a cruel world. Especially so, kapag nakikit mong ang market ng mismong mga chubby na to, na market mo, ay ang mga buff na nauuso ngayon. AMBISHOSA! Hoy lumebel ka! Pangarapin bang magkajowa ng may washboard abs! Oh well, baka naman labandera sya!

AS for me... I like 'em bouncy, fluffy and all cuddly!

It's a cruel world out there! Kaya kung mataba ka, at ayaw nila sa yo, lika dito. Akin ka na lang. Letche nilang lahat! Hehehehe.

Oh and by the way, I would like to greet a very very important gal pal. It's her special day!

HAPPY

HAPPY

HAPPY

EARTH DAY! MUDRANG KALIKASAN!

13 comments:

Lyka Bergen said...

I lyk this post. Especially the 'prettify-the-body' part. Yes, we want to dwell in a perfect house exactly the way we picture it. Pero we have to work (out) for it... and adorn it kaya magastos din ito. But pls girl, dont over-decorate. Minimalism is in!

mel beckham said...

I feel for you Ate Luis. Paano na lang kung magpapayat at hindi na tayo kumain ng marami. Kawawa ang mga restaurants. Hihina ang demand ng pagkain. Kawawa ang mga farmers kung wala nang bibili ng produkto nila. Bababa ang Gross National Product. Naisip ba ng mga buff-buffan yun! My gosh!

Gram Math said...

oh! its not good if your thin too, people think you have some kind of an incurable disease

The Zen Bitch said...

:-)

kawadjan said...

"Sister, that is exactly my point! I am decorating it!" -- well said, miss barbados. clap, clap, clap.

Yj said...

ha.... basta uulitin ko... hindi malnourished ang tawag sa gaya ko... pangmahirap ang term na yan...

ANOREXIC... yan antamang term... mas mahirap i-spell... may letter X...

nyahahahahaha ECHOZ...

oist ano na... gusto ko nga tumaba eh... kainis naman pano ba?

:: cb :: said...

bad naman nung other guys. lol at the cathedral comment! hahaha

bad trip earth day pala kahapon. P40 off sa starbucks. boo.

Dawn said...

I love it!!!!

May friend na akong Basilica!!!

Laban ka????

hahahahahahahahahaha

bampiraako said...

Basta ako, kakainin ko kung ano gusto ko kainin! (waaah.)

Luis Batchoy said...

lyka: zenxa na... IYou can nevr over accessorize

meL : exactly my point!

zen: ngingiti ngiti ka jan!

kawafjan: eh anorexic ka eh! Hwehehehe

Luis Batchoy said...

cb: kwawa nga si kuyang chef eh!

yj: kaloka kah! Ooo na, mayaman ka na! Hehehe

Dawn: yes my dear! Ang gustong magsimba, pumila mwahahaha

bampira: sakto gid na ya... oist mag pa manila ko fudtrip tah!

karakrus said...

hehehe. ako rin mejo chubby chubby na.

Luis Batchoy said...

kara: good for you then..heheheh